3 yellow roses


Betsie's Power

© 2009, Ruth Marlene Friesen

[How to plot an original short story]

Instead of using ingredients from my plotting cards, let's pick our own for each of the five parts. Here's my choices after reading and thinking about the power of decision-making.

Characters & Adjectives:
invalid who is pessimistic and depressed (Betsie)
caring neighbour who drops in to help out & takes her to appointments (Tereaza)

Setting:
invalid's home and large hospital corridors

Plot Problem:
struggle to help a sickly woman help herself to better conditions

Climax:
sick woman learns power of decision-making

Complication:
bad news from doctor

Betsie's Power

(c)2004 Ruth Marlene Friesen

Betsie called out a weak "Com'on in," when Tereaza knocked on the inside door in the porch. Tereaza bounded up the two steps and into Betsie's kitchen as her usual cheery self, and noted that Betsie's face lit up and she really had the effect of cheering up this sickly older woman.

That made her feel good, so as usual, she bustled about to do the various favours Betsie asked of her. She washed the bent over woman's grey curls in the bathroom sink, then sat her down at the table and put rollers in her hair, even though Betsie kept apologizing for the ragged old things. Tereaza threw a load of towels and linens into the washing machine next, and got a roast in the pot, and peeled potatoes, and all the while tried to switch Betsie's negative thinking to a more positive, hopeful vein.

When her time had run out, she was almost relieved to promise to take Betsie to see the eye specialist in the big city hospital the next day, and to get out of there. Much as she cared for this older friend, and Betsie did tip generously, the constant struggle to cheer Betsie up was getting her down.

That evening Tereaza picked up a book her brother had loaned her, and began to read the first chapter just before bed. She got excited as she realized this applied perfectly to Betsie. She would make a project tomorrow of teaching Betsie this way of thinking.

When she went to pick up Betsie, she was solicitous and friendly, but waited patiently for Betsie to get into the car without helping her any more than absolutely necessary.

Once they were settled in their seats, buckled up, and turning onto the highway, Betsie asked, "So what news do you know today?" She liked to hear Tereaza talk about her own interesting life.

"Well, I did learn something new last night. Do you believe that we are responsible for our choices?"

This started a discussion on sin and that yes, we no one to blame but ourselves for our decisions. Fortunately, God is willing to forgive our sins when we confess or admit to them, and ask for Jesus' blood to wipe them out. This wasn't exactly the point Tereaza wanted to work on, but she took time to develop it, so that Betsie would feel they were agreed on some basics.

Slowly Tereaza guided the conversation to examples, of specific decisions and their consequences. She used a couple of examples from her own life, then asked Betsie if she could name some decisions that had set the course of her life in a new direction.

The older woman was just getting warmed up about her memories as a young woman and the independent choice she made to take a job in a different town from where her family lived, when they arrived in the city. While she focused on city lights, Tereaza let Betsie talk about when she had several rooming options, how she chose the one that led to her meeting the young man whom she married.

They dropped the topic while Tereaza helped her friend into a wheelchair from the trunk, and took her into the huge hospital with its many corridors and mall-like walkways.

As usual, Betsie was soon hinting that she needed a bathroom. Tereaza had done this often enough that she remembered where the main facilities were on each floor. She zoomed the wheelchair into a stall just in time. Often she stayed in the cubicle with Betsie to help her stand and turn around, but this one was rather small, so she stepped outside and leaned against the door to think and pray. How was she going to help this woman learn to take more responsibility for her own life and care? She did need some help; obviously enough, and she didn't want to suddenly drop her caring ways, but she did hope to open her eyes to see that there were still lots of things she could do for herself.

When Betsie called out her name, and Tereaza opened the door, she found that Betsie had managed to get herself back into the wheelchair on her own. Wonderful

After letting her wash her hands, Tereaza zoomed the wheelchair down the long mall stretch to the office suite of the Eye specialist. They were just in time for her appointment, but were directed to a waiting area and had to wait another 45 minutes to get in. During that time, Betsie was in a mood to talk, so Tereaza laid aside the magazine that had caught her eye and concentrated on discussing decision-making and responsibilities with her friend.

Sometimes they were off on rabbit trails, and for a while they were distracted by some restless children nearby.

Finally they had the first session with an aide who tested Betsie's eye pressures. Then they were back in the waiting area. Tereaza had just brought their talk back to the power of making decisions, when they were called into the specialist's office.

The tall red-head doctor with the British accent was polite, but to the point. She had glaucoma in her eyes. The left eye was the worst. Betsie pulled herself up in her wheelchair and asked, "How soon can you operate?"

"We won't. You've already had all the surgeries to your eyes we can give you. There is no cure for glaucoma. All we can do is keep the pressures under control, but you will have to be faithful in putting the drops in your eyes."

Betsie stared at Tereaza incredulously.

Tereaza felt awkward. How could decision-making help here? But to save the day, she turned politely to the doctor and asked questions to clarify on Betsie's behalf. She knew that later on the way home, she'd have to explain to Betsie exactly how and why of all this.

Sure enough, once they had the prescription, and were in the car and heading home, Betsie forgot even the usual ice cream stop she liked to insist on, and peppered Tereaza with questions. She seemed to take this glaucoma diagnosis as a sentence to blindness.

Over in several ways, Tereaza explained that it was not a given that she would go blind. She could maintain her eyesight by faithfully putting the drops in her eyes. Betsie did not like to do that, and wanted Tereaza to promise to come over twice a day to put them in for her.

Suddenly Tereaza heard where this was going and where the opportunity to apply decision-making could come in. "Guess what, Betsie! Here's your chance to make a decision that will save your sight. I cannot come over that often. I have a life of my own to live, but how about if YOU decide to learn to put those drops in and to do it very punctually yourself? You can be depressed and worried, and be forgetful or you can decide to make this a top priority in your life. You have the power to save your eyes by doing this one hard thing until it becomes easy for you."

She broke into the smile Betsie often admired, the one with the dimples. "Just think, you might discover other decisions you can make to improve the quality of your life. Instead lying down and letting life's trials pummel you, you can rise up and draw fences around you to tell the trials how close they may come."

Betsie pursed her lips and stared straight forward for a few minutes.

Tereaza began to wonder if she ought to apologize... when Betsie announced, "Yes, I'm going to prove that I have the power to make decisions. I will do that as long as God gives me breath. That's the one decision I will leave up to Him."

Tereaza's dimples twinkled, and turned to laughter when Betsie added, "See, I have the power to make you smile and laugh."



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About the Author: Ruth Marlene Friesen is a novelist, web designer and friend with more imagination that she can use up! You'll find her touch and words all over Ruthe's Secret Roses, and about half a dozen other sites. Ruth tends to get involved if you become her friend! She takes mentoring seriously.


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