Ruth Marlene Friesen: Welcome!
This site is like Ruthe,
the heroine of my novel,
Ruthe's Secret Roses
Ruthe is . . .
intimate with God,
prays a lot,
a bleeding heart for the hurting,
a big sister,
has creative ideas,
likes to give
loyal to friends,
dreams of love and
dreams of writing a book
goes the extra mile
So this site offers;
good books to read!
help to become Friends with Jesus,
The One Ideal Real Friend
a cure for loneliness
An Older Sister's Coping Secret
how to pray Panic Prayers,
how to grow in faith
how to share your faith
Psst! I've got FREE taste treats of the novel ready for YOU! DOWNLOAD the first 3 chapters as an
eBOOK in beautiful colours, or read the first 8 chapters on this site, if you have time to stay a while. Start READING HERE!
OR, you can subscribe to a daily series of installments by email until you have read the 8 Chapter Sampler:
In Author's Arbour:
Let's Get Acquainted!
Write 4 Kids
Tell me Your Story
God, Give ME a Friend!
It was Valentine's Day, and each time I had the radio on in the kitchen it seemed each host or
hostess was focused on - not true lovers, - but those who hated the day because they were alone and
so desperately lonely. One host after another featured the misery of the unloved and friendless.
Whoa! I knew it was a problem, but wasn't aware that it was so huge!
Last night and this morning I've been thinking. There have certainly been times when I've been idle
and loneliness camped on me. These days I'm too busy doing things I love, that I feel are
meaningful, so I seldom think of myself as lonely now.
Then I got to thinking how many of the characters in my novel, Ruthe's Secret Roses, have a problem
Oh my goodness! This many? They don't all have it in the same form or degree, and they don't all
cope with it the same way, but let me start a list;
Muriel, the girl Ruthe found crouching nude under a clothes rack was desperate for a boyfriend,
Ronnie, her brother, went to some lengths to find a girlfriend when Ruthe rejected him,
Ian O'Brien, their father was very lonely after his wife died,
Granny O'Brien bitterly sealed herself off in a bedroom overlooking her son's home and spied on
Lloyd surrounded himself with buddies and loud music to drown out loneliness,
his uncle committed suicide over his loneliness - as far as they could tell,
Gord appeared lonely because he said so little, (he'd been found in a car, no trace of his
Phyllis had been lonely ever since she was raped as a young teen; she hid in books and education,
There are more, and of course,... Ruthe herself! She smothers her loneliness by talking continually
with the Lord, whom she feels, or assumes is with her at all times, and because the heals her, she
keeps reaching out to others who ought to find the same answer in Christ Jesus.
I'm sure if I go down the list of characters further I'll find more. Besides, I don't want to give
away the juiciest details.
But I think it would be good for us to take a head-on look at least three different kinds of
loneliness and how best to cope with each.
There is that longing for a mate to share secrets, commitments and eventually marriage intimacy
with. It comes to all of us because of how our bodies and souls are created. But some have a much
harder time with this because they feel so needy for love. Someone to accept, approve and appreciate
them. For those who have no friend at all, this fantasy that a boyfriend or a girlfirend, or a
sexual partner will solve all these problems in one fell swoop can get very strong.
There is also the intense loneliness of someone who has had a very close person to love and live
with, even have a family together with, for many years, and then that spouse or family member dies.
That cut-off feeling, like being personally dismembered can get very cruel with the pain of
Another kind of loneliness grows out of feeling rejected by family and friends. Bitterness sets in,
and an inner anger seethes and boils away, creating an odorous stew of hurts This type of aloneness
eats away at the body, making it sickly and older in a hurry.
Do you need a friend? Are you wishing for just ONE loyal friend who would stick with you through
thick and thin? Sometimes you feel quite friendless, right? Even though you might have had close
friends in the past. In fact, those good times in the past may make you more aware of your aloneness
However, let's note that being alone and loneliness are not one and the same. It is possible to be
totally alone and quite content and at peace with yourself, with God, and with that distant world
out there. I know; I have experienced both. It is easy to forget though, when you're heart is
screaming with the pain of loneliness.
So, if you were to cry out, "Oh, for one loyal friend! God, give ME a friend!" and if you were
really tuned in and able to hear His answer, what might it be?
I can give you some of the basic answers He would give you, same as He gives to everyone who
searches in His Word, the Bible. Same as the ones He's given me in response to my own cries for
1. Jesus, God's Son, would say, "Turn to Me. I died for you, but I'm alive again, and ever so eager
to walk and talk with you all day long!"
2. God has already said in Proverbs that whoever wants friends must first be a friend. So He wants
you to reach out to other lonely people, and be a friend to them first. Just like Ruthe, (my
novel's heroine), once you know the Lord Jesus as your continually present Friend, you just want
others to experience Him too! As you bless them in little ways, they begin to look up to you and
befriend you. Soon, like Ruthe, you'll have more friends than you can keep up with!
Of course there are many little ways to win friends and to cause them to respect you and become
loyal to you, but those are for another page. When it comes to overcoming loneliness, the above two
steps are about all you need.
Well, one more thing. You could just humbly pray every day, "God, give ME a Friend!" Just don't be
surprised if He turns out to be the very first friend He sends your way. Next He'll send you lonely
people who need you to be their friend.
Don't turn away from them. Help them. That's going to lead to many others admiring, respecting and
yes - even loving you!
To read sample chapters of my first book, Ruthe's Secret Roses online,
start at the index.
To order the e-book to download and read on your computer, uses the;
(or if you email me, we can make a deal and I'll send it to you on CD).
Naturally, I would love for you to order the softcover paperback edition from
You can also get it at;
Or ASK at any bookstore!
Ruthe's Secret Roses available
in softcover! Purchase it at
BookLocker.com and it will be in the mail to you within 48 hours!
Read it Right NOW!
In the Garden
Tips & Solutions
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