Ruth Marlene Friesen: Welcome!
This site is like Ruthe,
the heroine of my novel,
Ruthe's Secret Roses
Ruthe is . . .
intimate with God,
prays a lot,
a bleeding heart for the hurting,
a big sister,
has creative ideas,
likes to give
loyal to friends,
dreams of love and
dreams of writing a book
goes the extra mile
So this site offers;
good books to read!
help to become Friends with Jesus,
The One Ideal Real Friend
a cure for loneliness
An Older Sister's Coping Secret
how to pray Panic Prayers,
how to grow in faith
how to share your faith
how to become a writer
I come to the garden alone, while the dew is still on the roses, and the voice I hear, falling on my
ear.... Ruthe's Secret Roses illustrates that dear song!
A Book I can Highly Recommend
Managing Your Emotions:
by Joyce Meyer
Instead of Your Emotions Managing You
published by Harrison House, Inc.
Tulsa, Oklahoma 74153, 1997
Joyce Meyer is a well-known speaker and author in the United States. She even has a television
show, and some videos circulating, but I'm just becoming acquainted with her work. I've heard her
name before, and have seen quotes attributed to Joyce, but this book is the first of hers that I've
had opportunity to read.
My first impression was that this might be one of those quickly-produced, "this is what the masses
are buying" type of book. It is not deep writing, but the theology lines up true to my own
experience and grasp of God's principles for the healing of our emotions.
I soon discovered that Joyce is no stranger to this problem. She was a abused as a child, and
developed an angry personality that needed to be in charge and to be reassured and catered to in
many ways. However, as she dealt honestly with this abuse before God, and with the help of a very
patient and emotionally stable husband, Joyce has come through to victory over her emotions. She now
controls them instead of her emotions tossing her about and dashing her on the hard rocks of life.
She really has good advice, based on many Bible passages, to help others in this dilemma.
Although I've not been sexually abused, I can admit to some emotional abuse and being misunderstood
and deprived. I too have had to deal very honestly concerning these things before the Lord, and find
healing in obeying His Word. I can vouch that Joyce's counsel is wise.
She points out in the introduction that anger is just an emotion, and it needs to be brought under
control. Joyce says, "It is important to remember that emotions won't disappear and go away.
They will always be there. We must not deny their existence or feel guilty because of them. Instead
we are to channel them in the right direction. We are to deny the flesh the right to rule us, but we
are not to deny that it exists."
The key is to learn to control or manage our emotions. Joyce shows this over and over in a number
of ways throughout the book. Lest you and I think we'd like to learn these lessons fast, and be
done with our troubles, there is a little illustration about the baby eaglet who has a tiny sharp
tooth at the end of his beak while still in the shell. "He hits the shell repeatedly until it
cracks open. This takes a long time and requires a lot of tenacity. Sometimes well-meaning people
try to help by breaking open the shell. When that happens, often the eaglet dies." We too, need
the experience of struggle as we learn self-control to develop a healthy maturity.
There are really so many good points in this book, it is hard to pick just a few to mention in a
review, but I appreciated the things Joyce writes about assuming personal responsibility, about
inner healing versus emotional healing, and dealing with self-pity. The chapters on forgiveness and
emotional stability are very good too. I like to hope they will save some people a lot of heartache
and pain, and show them the way out of their intense hurt.
But then, the parts on depression, although blunt as a surgeon's scapel, could bring about wonders
for some folks I know too! It may take some humility and a real desire to come out of depression,
but if a reader wants to deal in truth, the counsel here is bound to help.
A lot of North American writers dwell only on the aspect of handling guilt, which doesn't wash in
the middle eastern culture that is shame-based. I've only recently come across books like Honor
and Shame by Roland Muller, which show that to reach shame-based people we need a different
approach. And yet, Christ's words are already in the Bible, ones that minister to this mind-set.
Meyer's chapters on addiction and co-dependency are interesting. I would define co-dependency a
little differently, but the range and the things she says about addictions are quite helpful.
A new thought to me, was her suggestion that Satan is out to get the child. Sure enough, a look at
the Bible shows that all through Scripture many attempts were made to destroy or prevent the birth
of children. Joyce Meyer says Satan is also out to destroy the child within us! That's why so many
of us do not have joy. We can't delight in simple pleasures or have fun. - I never thought of it
that way, but I suspect she's right.
We need to unstop the wells, let life and laughter flow and be refreshed even while we refresh those
around us. This only comes when we have our emotions under control, and submit to Christ.
Years ago, I once told the Lord that I would know I was healed of some deep wounds when singing
would bubble up inside of me. That has begun to happen at times, so I must be nearing this final
level of healed emotions.
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